Am I acting like a child??

[TexasTransplant]

I had a dream last night that seems very important. I understand the context but would love other's input as well. Some of it, like the snow and skiing, stumps me.

I was in a house with my youngest son and I was on the phone with my husband. He was on his way to our hometown and I was supposed to be packing and heading there as well with our son. I didn't want to go there so I was taking my time packing. This house I was in that was supposed to be ours was messy and I wanted to clean it before we left but realized it'd take up too much time and decided I could leave it until I got back. I was aware that I was wearing sandals and shorts, warm weather clothes, for my trip. I walked to this huge bay window and looked outside. It had started to snow! This was a huge surprise to me and I saw individual snow flakes flutter to the ground. Everything outside had just started to become white with snow. My husband called to ask me if we'd left yet, urging me to get moving, and I told him it was snowing. I felt like this changed our plans and we should rethink going. I also felt like I was dressed totally wrong..."Who wears sandals in the snow??" I was still looking out the window noticing a hill with a ski lift out there speaking to my husband on the phone. I asked him if he thought we'd have to shovel the driveway now and he said, "This IS Colorado, of course we will. Now come on." I thought I was in Iowa during this dream though. (Not sure about the state significance. We live in Texas and snow is a foreign concept to us. Never been to CO or IA) My mother called me after my husband and said there was a hole in my roof. Then she showed up to show it to me, however the hole wasn't in my roof after all. She walked me over to a corner in the room and lifted a lampshade near the floor that smelled like smoke. A light bulb was on under it and it'd gotten very hot and burned a small hole in the shade. I tried to turn it off but it only dimmed a bit. This lightbulb was a little larger than a normal one and was made of very thick, hand blown glass. I couldn't believe I almost left this house with this light on that way thinking the house could've burned down while I was gone.

Next I had arrived and was with my husband. He was showing me around the place we'd rented to stay in. I noticed there were several beds to each room and realized we could've just gotten by renting one or two instead of several. I saw the price for each room was $200. The main bedroom had a small escalator but I noticed it was turned off. I walked up it and found a little girl's room. I climbed into the bed and someone took my photo there. I looked like a child. I walked back to our main room and saw that there was a crib in the closet area for a baby. I thought about how there were so many child beds here to sleep in. Next scene the place had turned into an antique store and I was asking the two guys at the desk if I could walk through to the back to look out that window again from the first scene (the one with the snow ski lift).

[TexasTransplant]

Just read my daily devotion...
"The light of my presence is shining upon you in benedictions of peace. Let my light shine in you without dimming it with worries and fears."

Definitely fits today in regards to this dream and my mother. Has to do with getting condemnation confused with Holy Spirit. Feeling rushed to do something he's not rushing me to do fearing he's upset with me for waiting.

Still not sure if I'm viewing the rest correctly regarding the child beds. Just not sure. And the snow, the ski lifts (recurring theme) the escalator...no ideas yet.

[bella]

I was in a big rush when I read through your dream, but I had a sense that God wanted to speak to me about it. I just haven't had a chance to calm down and think about it. But I'm going to.

In my dreams in the past, snow has always been a positive symbol and there's usually been something exquisitely beautiful about the dream. Just wanting to encourage you.

[TexasTransplant]

Thank you friend! I think I may even understand this one better today. Please feel free to add your thoughts, though, I prize them . This was one of those that you wake from feeling like it's 'disciplinary' when in fact it's anything but. He was pretty clear about speaking to me on all this once I sat and prayed about things. This subject matter is about my mother and our difficult relationship. Basically over our vacation it dawned on me that she doesn't know how to LOVE. She just doesn't, and people leave the room hurt and confused. I came home and thought I'd look up 'love' from 1 Corinthians and point out all the ways she fails at it in hopes that it'd make me feel better in my own head. (of course I didn't articulate my actions quite this way at the time!) Can you draw the obvious conclusion of what Jesus did instead?

That's right, He showed me how I have HATED her. I think I failed each and every point from that chapter when it comes to her. Nobody else, just her. I was absolutely dumbfounded. The night before this amazing revelation I woke up in the middle of one of those deep yet simple conversations with him. It went something like, "All of the issues of the heart are really just love problems." Then I asked, "So...everyone in the whole wide world that has emotional problems really can just be fixed with love? Is that what you're saying here?" He didn't answer me but I think He nodded . The next morning I found out I've been hating on her, repented, had Brad pressuring me to call my parents so they would leave him alone that day, and then I had this dream.

I assumed it was about me obeying my husband (*gag!*) and somehow God was calling me a child for avoiding them and that I should suck up the fact that I literally feel ill when I speak to them and have to endure various insults and negativity. What he was really saying in the dream was, "Focus on me and I'll teach you to love her better one step at a time. You are not quite ready to pass this test of loving her well just yet, you are not mature enough in this area. Voices that rush and condemn you are not from me. Those are worries that dim your light and make things difficult." Somehow peering out over the snow and ski lift had to do with him revealing this love/hate issue to me and waiting on Him to show me how to do things one step at a time. It was all about me thinking I needed to bite off more than I could chew at the time. The Lord is going to heal me and fix all this with her, but he also isn't rushing me to get it all done for the sake of looking like some kind of disgraceful Christian.

I know this makes zero sense, I just reread it. But I get it . Hahaha!

[bella]

Hi there! What you wrote made perfect sense to me, of course.

OK, so when I first read the dream, I too felt that it was about your mum so I think you're right on track there.

Snow can represent God bringing cleansing, purity.

Escalators seem to be symbolic of moving up - without effort if they're turned on, with effort if you have to walk them.

I'm not sure why you were in Colorado, but a few major ministries moved there and each said God told them to move there. Could be a 'high places' kind of thing. Not sure at all. A thought just came that it could be about being in a place gleaning from others knowledge (existing ministries). Again, I don't know, just speculating.

I felt that your mum saying you had a hole in your roof is like a criticism that you're off track in your thinking - something's not right - but then it turns out there is not a hole in your roof i.e. you're right, there's no problem.

I wondered if the light bulb overheating could represent how, when God gives us revelation on something, it's for our and the other person's (usually) benefit. But sometimes we get annoyed when we get relevation i.e. we can identify an issue and instead of praying or whatever, we get mad (overheat) about the situation. Again, just a thought.

I believe your youngest son could be representing your spirit-man, hence he's going with you.

Your home town could represent matters of the heart - home is where the heart is.

All the children's beds and 'acting' like a child could represent getting reacquainted with child-like rest, child-like qualities. So easy to just jump to a fear of it being a negative symbol, but it may not be.

I think, by what you said, you've got this dream sorted but maybe the above symbols just kind of clarify for you. If not, let me know.

[TexasTransplant]

Could be a 'high places' kind of thing.

Very good! I like that. I'm still wondering why I felt like I was in Iowa. Iowa simply means 'corn' to me, that's all I know them for. Somewhere I read that the word can mean 'snow faced' in Native American language.

I felt that your mum saying you had a hole in your roof is like a criticism that you're off track in your thinking - something's not right - but then it turns out there is not a hole in your roof

This is TRUE. She literally thinks I'm wrong when I say Jesus is helping me work through things. She thinks I'm nuts. I don't know how you can claim to be a believer and not understand something so simple as that. I'm going to be quiet now because I'm supposed to be working on loving her better .

getting reacquainted with child-like rest, child-like qualities

Love this part because I've been thinking about that subject lately so much but not putting it with this stuff. I've been thinking about how amazing my faith was that first year walking with Him and wondering what's happened to it since. I think He's bringing it all up to me. Everything was easier then, more black and white, this is the will of God, this is not, ask him and he will make it right. You know? I know there are gray areas that come with growing up in Him but some of that for me is just plain due to doubt. I've made it more complicated than it is. His delaying something doesn't mean He's not going to do it for me. It's a yes it's just not here yet. Like in Habbakuk. And Hebrews. I was noticing this just a few minutes ago with Brad. When I first got saved I had a clear vision of what God wanted for our marriage complete with a mission statement I'll never forget writing down in red. "Brad and I will work TOGETHER to expand the Kingdom of God FOR God." When I wrote it out I didn't yet even know what the term Kingdom of God meant, I just felt it come up out of me. Later I learned it does indeed expand . But over the years, things improved just enough without coming to that point of declaration for me to settle and accept that what I dreamed of wasn't going to happen. This was as good as it was gonna get. He did so many miracles that I felt like a brat for wanting more. The thing is, HE'S the one that gave me that dream in the first place. Lately I've been wanting us to pray together, or even him to pray for me and take the lead spiritually and feeling profoundly disappointed since it looks like that will never happen. God reminded me this morning that back then when I was brand new and full of faith that I never doubted this could happen. So....that's what I'm working on today!

In regards to putting it in practice for my 'mother' stuff, I don't know. I've always felt like I was the adult and she needed to be fixed and taken care of. I know this is a common ailment a lot of kids have, unfortunately. Maybe that's where this fits. I'm praying about it!

[discerning]

Hey, Texas. Lots of wisdom in this post. Just wanted to offer a couple things if I may. Cj noted, 'snow can represent God bringing cleansing, purity.' To that I would add, snow can also represent grace.

Iowa means corn to me too. I drove through it once. Miles and miles of endless acres of corn with no end in sight. Reminded me of His provision in that season.

Then there's this...

Iowa: organized as a U.S. territory 1838; admitted as a state 1846, ultimately from the name of the native people, of the Chiwere branch of the Aiouan family; said to be from Dakota ayuxba "sleepy ones."

The two seem contradictory at first but, in hindsight, I can say that both perceptions applied equally. I was 'just passin through' an especially difficult season at that time...one not too dissimilar to the path you are walking in faith now.

That to say, press on. Papa is leading you every step of the way.

blessings on you,

[bella]

OK, I looked up Iowa in my dream dictionary. I haven't got it in front of me, but it had 3 suggested meanings. One was what discerning said 'sleepy ones', the other was heartland. And yes, the third to do with snow. You said 'snow-faced'.

And I just looked it up on wikipedia and they say it's considered America's heartland.

Colorado apparently means reddish. Which stood out to me because of the bookstore dream I had where red was a strong symbol in one part.

This dream to me is amazingly awesome. Being surrounded by snow in dreams is a good thing. A winter wonderland kind of beauty quite often.

[discerning]

Now you made me go back & look up the etymology of Colorado since that stood out to you. All I knew about it was the color reference but three links back took me to the root, cell, meaning to hide or to cover.

Reading back over the dream, considering that, the skiing stood out. Speaks to me of gliding gracefully, traveling to a destination. Ski lift, rising above circumstances to get a clearer view perhaps? I don't snow ski but I grew up water skiing. If I had to sum up the experience in one word it would be 'freedom'. Pure bliss. Sweet.

[adding here re the Colorado reference: dh walked by & said simply, mountains, no one mentioned mountains. Just tossin that on the table in case it sparks a new thought for you]

Oh, and cj's earlier comment re ministries in CO immediate brought to mind Focus on the Famly.

Amazing dream, I agree, full of potential. Hope something here helps provide a piece of the puzzle. I have a sense of excitement surrounding this dream...good things to come. Keeping this in prayer.

blessings in abundance,

[TexasTransplant]

Thank you so much guys!! Really! I agree with so much of what you both have pointed out and it all really resonates. Yes, CJ, just like a winter wonderland. All of my snowy ski dreams can be described that way. Focus on the Family is SPOT ON, Discerning. The mountains or 'high places' have been a theme the last few months and He has me slowly going through the book 'Hinds Feet for High Places'. The corn = provision...amazing. I love how He gives us dreams to encourage BEFORE things come up . Our oldest (17) woke us up at 2am very sick. He's basically been sick like this on and off since Feb 2011. It has (we think) something to do with infected, hidden, lingual tonsils that are at the base of his tongue. Causes high fever, vomitting, swollen neck glands. None of our docs want to touch them because its a difficult surgery. But it's affecting him so much. He's pale and puny and has no appetite. I fell back asleep last night scared to death about this. I think hubby fell asleep praying . That was interesting! Anyway, when I woke up this morning the song 'God of Angel Armies' was playing in my head. More than that, each word was hitting me like revelation tends to do. I knew the Lord himself was singing it to me. All fear is gone, I have no doubts he'll heal Trent. He's reminded me of all the promises concerning him too. I feel amazingly uplifted and hopeful when the circumstances should have me the other way around. Also sort of fitting in with this dream, throughout the morning I've been noticing an onslaught of negative thoughts around my mom. I haven't even spoken to her. I think the enemy is trying to shift my focus OFF my family . Pray that I will continue to trust Him through this stuff, stay at rest, and that Trent will receive total healing (including emotions) from this attack. He's pretty much been sickly all of his high school career. It's caused much more harm than fever. He wants to feel better and look better .

[bella]

I was going to wait til.morning to post but I have to now in the middle of the night. Focus on the Family was THE ministry that specifically came to mind when I was thinking about Colorado. and the ministries there. A couple of days before this dream I got on Google maps and was looking at Colorado so was surprised to see you mention it in this dream.

obviously I'll be praying for you all.

[LadyinChrist]

It has (we think) something to do with infected, hidden, lingual tonsils that are at the base of his tongue. Causes high fever, vomitting, swollen neck glands. None of our docs want to touch them because its a difficult surgery. But it's affecting him so much. He's pale and puny and has no appetite. I fell back asleep last night scared to death about this. I think hubby fell asleep praying Smile. That was interesting!

Hey TT,

I think I have an answer to your prayers. Have you ever heard of collodial silver? Since a child I have been prone to get tonsillitis alot.
It would take weeks of antibiotic to heal until I found collodial silver.
Now it takes a day or 2. Usually a day.

I can't say enough good about it. The Lord knew what He was doing when He created silver. The olden days, a silver coin would be placed into milk to rid it of all bacterias, and it works. Silver is used in most hospital equipment now because it cannot and will not pick up bacterias, but will kill all bacterias known to man. ... With tonsillitis, I just gargle a few drops, swallow a little to get it all the way down the throat, and after a minute spit the rest out.... and healed. I have never had to see a doctor again for tonsillitis.

Take a look at this and the perfect reviews.... You can get this usually in any local health food store. This can be used for everything from bronchitis, flu, colds, tonsillitis, skin infections, acne, ulcers, stomach problems, numerous illnesses. I've even used it in the wash machine. If I forgot and left clothes in too long and a mildew smell comes on them, I rewash with a few drops, and all mildew gone. I wouldn't go without it in my medicine cabinet. 1- 4 oz bottle can last me 2 yrs.

http://www.amazon.com/Sovereign-Silver- ... ign+silver

(I do trust the Lords healing more than the silver, although, I thank Him for the silver too.)
Blessings,
Lady

[TexasTransplant]

Thanks Lady, I will definitely look into it. I'm only assuming that's what's going on with him again. I feel like the Lord may have given me a little picture of vocal cords when I was praying for him this morning and the lingual tonsils are located right on them. That's what makes the surgery so dangerous. I'll have to wait until Mon to get him into see the doc. But my gut (spirit maybe) tells me that's where the infection is. I've put my foot down with this finally, I've had enough! I felt like the Lord was saying,"Stop letting this wreak havoc!" I also feel like we are about to embark on some new journey regarding it. I'm trusting him!

[LadyinChrist]

Yes I hear ya tt, I was told at a later age my tonsils couldn't be removed because of the danger of the surgery. My vocal chords were effected every time an infection came back, and for someone who loves to sing that was hard. There were times I thought I would never be able to sing again. The silver healed my vocal chords to the point of a miracle. I had never heard my voice sing so well. I really think this will help your son, and something so simple almost hard to believe, but tis true.

[TexasTransplant]

Thanks, I believe you! I'm planning to ask the doc tomorrow about it. I was already thinking about looking into some homeopathic methods anyway.